Mohni was a devoted wife to her life partner Gian and mother of three incredible sons, Sukhraj, Amar and Jaspal, who were all, her beginning and end. She was a perfect wife and the most wonderful daughter, sister and aunt that any parent, sibling, niece/nephew could ask for. She was a phenomenal woman. Understated, yet extraordinary in her gifts and talents combined with a generosity of spirit that all who knew her would have experienced.
Born in the Punjab on 5th June 1956, Mohni showed early signs of her intellectual potential. At the age of 7 she was called Ram Bhaajni by all who observed her reciting paath at the top of her voice on the rooftop veranda. Everything she did she gave it her all.
Considering she arrived in the UK from India at the age of 10 in 1966 speaking only two words of English, yes/no, she went on to train and qualify as an English teacher excelling within her profession in secondary schools for 39 years. She began her teaching career in Canvey Island. This was no mean feat for any newly qualified English teacher in an Essex secondary school, let alone an Indian woman in 1979, but Mohni impressed the head teacher and made her first appointment memorable. She went on to have a long career in teaching, specialising in Special Needs Education. However, Mohni did not stop there, she went on to achieve postgraduate success, adding to her already excellent skills in dyslexia and Special Needs Education. She was highly valued by her work colleagues who knew her metal. Her commitment was exemplified by the fact that she was often the first one in and the last one out, always prioritising her students and colleagues.
Mohni joined the Hayer family at age 26 on 25th August 1982 when she married Gian, a fellow teacher specialising in sciences. Their marriage was a union of equals and was agreed after only two family meetings and with less than 15 minutes communication between the couple, but such was the alignment of their stars that they built a relationship others looked at, with awe. Their relationship developed to a roaring fire of love spanning 38 and a half years, establishing a strong unshakeable foundation of love, deference and respect which included family much wider than their core unit of 5.
Mohni was a matriarch, a lynch pin, a silent doer and a grafter. She never sought praise, which is why her 60th surprise birthday was such a special event, where we were able to do for her what she did for others countless times. Her Christmas dinners were legendary and all the extended family would gather to celebrate the day at Mohni and Gian’s.
Mohni loved animals and she brought her love of dogs and tigers to Derby. Those she cherished the most were her beloved Skip and Tyler, taking them for long walks at Foremark, Carsington Reservoir and King Georges Park. Mohni was an avid reader and read copious amounts of literature, from Steinbeck, to Dickens, to Shakespeare. The union of sciences and humanities in the Hayer household was another expression of their pre-ordained alignment. Living in a family of men, Mohni was also fully versed in football parlance, as a lifelong Man Utd fan, she was not averse to calling them “useless idiots” even when they were winning the league. Like most teachers, Mohni could cope with the ups and downs of the comprehensive schooling system but was most challenged when teaching her own children; the pursed lips were a common feature when the homework books came out.
Mohni watched, absorbed and held peoples confidences. She was the glue, the rock and the light in her family. Seeing the marriage of one of her sons brought Mohni huge happiness and Maneesha, became the daughter she never had. Words cannot convey the void she has left behind and how much she will be missed. She will be remembered for her selfless care of others, her support of numerous animal welfare charities, extensive repertoire of skills including, photography expertise, literary prowess, painting and decorating, exceptional dressmaking and haberdashery, and a superb cook and host. Finally, beyond everything she learned, her innate sense of duty, respect and love underpinned all that she did.
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